Cut by a Razor
Did you hear about the nurse who swallowed a razor blade?

She gave herself a tonsilectomy, an appendectomy, a hysterectomy, and circumcised three of the doctors on her shift!

Food for Thought
Patient: Doctor, you've gotta help me. I eat apples, apples later come out into the toilet. I eat bananas, bananas come out."

Doctor: That's easy. Eat shit!

Geneologist
What is the difference between a genealogist and a gynecologist?

One looks up the family tree and the other looks up the family bush.

Geriatric Gynecologist
What do you call a geriatric gynecologist?

A spreader of old wives' tales!

Keep fit... die healthy
What does a short sighted gynecologist and a dog have in common?

They both have wet noses!

The Difference Is
What is the difference between a hematologist and a urologist?

A hematologist pricks your finger.

Tired gynocologist
What did the gynocologist say to his wife when he got home?

I'm Bushed!

Until Twelve
I was twelve before I realized I could cough without having a doctor hold my balls!

Where's My Pen
A doctor pulls out a thermometer from his shirt pocket.
He looks at it and says, "Shit, some asshole has my pen!!!"

You Have VD
What's worse than having your doctor tell you that you have VD?

Having your dentist tell you!